Who Was Speaking to Him

[ Ego, Orpheus, fēminae vātēs nōn eram. ]

She was keen on romancing her feelings like they were distant songs, since she was in love. Although Shanaya did not harbor any ill will toward him, she was unable to understand her own dark side, which seemed to elude her like her desire to meet Orpheus in person.

Also, she believed that her sister might betray or berate Orpheus, something that she could never approve of. It was never in her nature to betray anyone, even more so the only love in her life! Yet, she was still impulsively inclined to believe that Orpheus would not find her in the end, because she had seen all other suitors fail miserably at fulfilling her stringent conditions.

If not for the love of Vice, every one of these men would have perished under her curse, an evil that she could not fully control, as such. Although none of them were cognizant of her magical presence, the command of Virtue was an undeniable edict that invisibly set the entropy of hell to work towards an end.

However, Vice, being rebellious, had her own complaints that she could not absolve, and hence was unable to understand her stance with respect to her sister. Nonetheless, she was always in complete confidence of her lightness, speaking in whispers to the very heart of being pure, and of the sorrow of the fall of man from paradise. It was as if she did not exist, as a dream does not seem to exist, yet all the prisoners still wanted to be in heaven, where she did not allow anyone.

However, she was doubtful if Orpheus wanted to return to the lightness of being! He seemed musically reliant on resolving the finer details of absolution that could create a perfect hell, but he did not seem to travel in the direction of heaven. He was not a prophet, and neither was he eager to fill his soul with hell’s tallies!

Instead, to her surprise, she observed that he was constructing the very idea that heaven and hell both belonged to him, and still he was indifferent and alone. It was as if he was saddened to know that Sandhya did not love him, yet even so, he wanted her to return to his pure heart, so that they could create a perfect darkness of their own and call it heaven!

Shanaya could not help but smile at her own deception, as Orpheus could not recognize her whispers and often thought that he was silently thinking about Sandhya, when in reality, it was she who dwelled in the purity of his heart.

She could see that Sandhya did not betray her by not revealing to Orpheus that it was her sister who spoke to him in silent thoughts. She did not say that it was her either! Sometimes, it seemed to her, that they were speaking in one voice to the one man who could really listen to them.

Thus was the recollection of the woman when she wanted to say how much she missed Orpheus, yet she was still unsure if he would be able to face her inability to express feelings of romance when he needed it most.

Obscūrus dēscendit meus ad adytum amōris

Orcī maestum corpus umbrārum cōnfūsiō est

Allēviās cor meum, tū es somnus quī appāruit mihi

मम प्रियः तिमिरमयः मदनस्यान्तर्गृहं प्रत्यवरोहति ।

यमराजस्य विषादपूर्णं शरीरं छायानां संमिश्रणमस्ति ॥

त्वं मम हृदयं लघूकरोषि, त्वमेव स स्वप्नः यो मह्यं प्रादुरभूत् ॥

* Latin and Sanskrit written with the help of AI. 

The Shadow of Virtue

[ Ego, Orpheus, nescius eram eam mē dīligere. ]

The far sun was setting within the heart of the forest, and Shanaya could still perceive the flute of Orpheus, slowly disappearing into the dusk. The affair of the sun and the dusk strangely made her sad, as she was suddenly reminded of her own loneliness.

She was reminded by the mirror that Orpheus was still not aware of her, although she knew that she had not chosen to reveal herself, a willful predicament that might as well be her destiny. Even so, she wished that her lover would take notice of her presence, despite that she had concealed herself from him.

Also, she could feel that Sandhya was not letting her touch those regions of her mind that were obscured by negativity. Virtue understood that Sandhya did not want to talk with her as much as she wanted to, a rejection that made her even more detached.

Yet, she could never stay away from her oneness with her sister that she could not deny for anything, even for envy! Since Orpheus was closer to Sandhya, she strongly felt that if not by her, she would never be able to come closer to him, a wish that held her cruel heart closer to love than ever.    

On one hand, she was deeply enamored with Orpheus. On the other hand, she hated him for ignoring her for so long. Has she not spoken to him in morning flowers? Has she not followed him like a shadow ever since she fell in love with him? She could feel the tears well up, yet she would never cry, for she did not want him to find her as a shadow of her sister. On thinking like this, she suddenly realized that her own shadow was slowly encircling her sister and her lover, offering her glimpses of an evil power that she did not fully understand.

She could feel him kiss her, and how Sandhya had worn a soft black dress for the evening. She wore a sapphire pendant that seemed to illuminate her mirror like a hellish spell. She wanted to ask Sandhya if she could have that pendant, which she suspected had been given to her by him tonight.

Unlike Sandhya, she felt compelled to love Orpheus, a bridal urge that made her yearn for him with everything she had. She could feel her breathing becoming more feverish beneath her pink satin, and as she watched her lover kiss her sister, she could almost feel that he was winning over her hatred, for she never knew a kiss could be so beautiful!  

She was waiting for the sun to rise again, so that she could once again let Orpheus know how much she wanted him to come closer, a secret wish that Shanaya did not want to even share with her sister. She wanted to tell him that his quest was almost at the end, and that he shall redeem himself from her curse, if not for her love.

Thus was the confession of the woman when she wrote down her feelings for her lover on a blank page, not leaving the mirror that was set in silent pearls absorbing the moonlight.

Sērā nocte per umbrās serpente ad inferōs, amōrem dīmissum

Trīstī invidiā meā, cor meum sentit allēviārī ad invidiam tuam

Artis tormenta tū, artis tormentīs mihi in sōliloquiīs

Redime mē ut abstineam, redime tē ad inferna dēgressum.

निशीथे, पातालोलकं प्रति सर्पन्त्यां छायायाम्, प्रेमा विसृष्टः ।

मम शोकाकुलेन द्वेषेण, तवेर्ष्यां प्रति मम हृदयं लघूभवति ॥

त्वमेव कलायाः यातनाः, मह्यं कलायाः यातनाः एकभाषणेषु वर्तन्ते ।

मां त्रायस्व यथा अहं विरमेयम्, आत्मानं त्रायस्व यः पातालोलकं प्रत्यवरूढः ॥

* Latin and Sanskrit written with the help of AI. 

A Vision of the Circle

[ Ego, Orpheus, fēminam amāvī etiam cum contrā mē esset. ]

She intended to know both sides of the story, but with the foreknowledge that she could not alter the course of hell. It was as if she could see in her mind’s eye that the trees were still advancing in darkness like an army of flying dragons who were invisible to mortals! She half expected the invincible army to show mercy to her sons, yet she still prayed that they might be granted a peaceful death, which is the greatest prayer a mortal could ask from the Lord of Hell.

At first, the mother thought of placing her own immortality as a ransom to save her sons, but she was deterred by Shanaya, who did not think the men deserved such sacrifice. Yet, she was told by the ruby that none dies, as after the execution, they are resurrected in glass prisons for eternities, and that she could meet her sons there even after they have descended into the sentence.

Virtue had explained that thus her gamble for eternity was accepted by Orpheus, who wanted to free her, even against her own desire to oppose his verdict. Shanaya had told her that after the trees devour the souls of her sons, their lights were preserved as gemstones within their stony corpus, and on finding these stones, she could speak with the prisoners, who were carried by the endless cycle of roots into their respective closures underground. 

At an even deeper conversation, she was simply happy to love and be loved. Even so, she wanted to know what would happen if she opposed the verdict of Orpheus; what if she did not absolve her karmic debt? However, she knew for certain that her demon lover would not abandon her, even if she had a difference of opinion.

Shanaya had suggested that she ask the magic book and see for herself the visions withheld in the invisible testimony. She had started to feel that her sister wanted her to return to her at her crystal palace, yet she was hindered by her unresolved dues to the forest of forbiddance.

Desirous of answers, Vice had closed her eyes when she placed the ruby on the blank page of the book, so that her own conflicts would not interfere with the vision! When she opened her eyes, she saw that the ancient book had revealed a magical word to her!  

نصيب

She was surprised that she could read this ancient alphabet that stated, “Nasib”, yet she was not certain what it meant. As she wanted to know more, the book revealed the vision of the wheel of fate, circles intersecting circles, with the stars and planets set in absolute Maya!

In an epiphany, she had realized that once the great watch of time had been set in motion, she had no other option but to complete her Karmic circle, so she might yet again be reunited with Virtue. However, despite the revelation, she still wanted to ask Orpheus this question in person, but that was for another day!

This was the soliloquy of the woman when she had started to understand that her gamble would make her eternally betrothed to Orpheus. Whether she would think that she was indebted to Orpheus would, however, depend on if she loved him with her heart.

Fātālis ipse eō somnō congregātō, sī dēprehēnsa sum

Innuendīs testificāta dialōgō arboreō, et mandāta revelābit tandem

Sāncte diabole, est tū appāruistī mihi?

भाग्यबद्धः स एव तस्मिन् शयने संहृते, यदि मोहिताऽहम् ।

सङ्केतैः साक्षीकृतः वृक्षतुल्ये संवादे, स चान्ते नियोगान् संप्रकटयिष्यति ॥

हे पवित्र यमराज, किं त्वं मह्यं प्रादुरभूः ॥

*Arabic, Latin, and Sanskrit written with the help of AI. 

The Revelation of the Forest

[ Ego, Orpheus, fēminae per somnia dīxī antequam mē nōrat. ]

Karma! Sandhya had presupposed that she, being a Goddess, was beyond karmic debt. She was prone to forgiving herself for having perpetuated wickedness in hell, if not by intent. It was but in Vice to disobey the eternal laws of darkness, as she thought she could make her own laws, which would be held sacrosanct in the underworld.

Then one day, Shanaya asked her some difficult questions, those that she paused to answer.

She could not believe her own silence.

It was a benevolent morning in the forbidden forest, and on listening intently, she could hear a chant that seemed to emanate from the heart of the woodland. She had suddenly forgotten that she was surrounded by the ancient trees who fed on the flesh and bones of the prisoners. Instead, the forest appeared to be welcoming her, but she was not sure if this appearance was deceptive.

Shanaya was speaking to her in distant birdsong, but she could recognize her disguise.

On hearing the solitary blackbird amidst the overarching trees, she was curious about how a melody so beautiful could be sustained in hell, a place where evil ruled with absolute control! She was also wondering if she herself was surrounded by evil, and amidst the same, did she want to sing in the voices of birds.

She remembered that the swans had gifted her a ruby that carried the thoughts of her sister to her, something that she was not yet ready to appreciate. She also remembered that Orpheus had given her a cryptic book, consisting of empty pages. He had said that, when the time comes, the vision will appear in ink, and you shall be able to converse with the soul.

Even so, she had carelessly placed the ruby on an empty page of the book that smelled of amber and the unseen. To her surprise, words began to appear on the blank pages, a magic that she had not expected!

زَهْر

“Zahr.” That was the first word that appeared! She could see it written with deep blue ink, by a calligraphy that seemed to appear from a far past. The ruby was still speaking to her, and the book revealed a painting of the trees, flowers, and leaves, and, as if she could hear the blackbird singing to her, yet once again. She had ventured to know more, and the book showed her the vision of a desert and a solitary man walking on it, and the forest following him like an ocean.  

On looking closer, she could see the vision did not include her, as if the black river was not born in this realm as yet. The sun and the moon were yet to be seen, and it was neither dawn nor dusk; the man was walking in his own darkness, illumined only by the light of his own heart.

Shanaya had asked, “If you are sovereign, then why did you fear condemnation to eternal prison?” She could hear her asking, “And if so, why did you need to be rescued?”

She was sitting silently in front of her dark window, beyond which the trees reverberated with a solemn chant, a mantra that she could vaguely understand. She could feel the spell slowly fill the night sky as the forest spoke in a masculine voice, “Om Mani Padme Hum”, only to be interspersed by the distant song of a blackbird.  

Thus was the soliloquy of Sandhya when she realized that she might have fallen in love with Orpheus, even if only for now!

Iamdiū somnus mihi erat, ipse tempora umbrārum adiūvit

Certum est quod fors cūnctam terram creet alteram

Sī regis ipse diēs, lēthum quoque frondibus affers

Subitō sāncta mors appāruit, trēmens fātālia tandem sum

Aetheriī cantant melodī, cantant avēs līberae mihi

चिरं मे शयनं बभूव, स एव च्छायानां कालमुदग्रहीत् ।

नियतं यद् दैवमेवापरं कृत्स्नं मण्डलं सृजति ॥

यदि त्वं स्वयमह्नां शासिता, तर्हि पत्राणामपि नाशं वहसि ।

अकस्मात् पवित्रा मृत्युः प्रादुरभूत्, नियतिबद्धाऽहं शेपेऽन्ते ॥

दिव्याः गायका गायन्ति, मुक्ताः विहगाः मह्यं कूजन्ति ॥

* Arabic, Latin, and Sanskrit are written with the help of AI. 

O! For a Fair Judgment

[ Ego, Orpheus, mulierem amavi cum eam omnes viri prodidissent. ]

The bluish intrigue of deception attracted her! She could see that he was reinstating his authority in hell with a clear jurisprudence, yet he had balanced his powers with a poise that almost felt like walking on a rope! Orpheus seemed to have a very clear vision of what he wanted from her, yet this vision did not include an obligation for having been loved.

Vice understood that she was free to love him or not, yet she had no other choice but to love him if she wanted the evil powers that he could bestow. Also, she was assured that he would love her still even though she did not.

The choice was illusory, but was it deceptive? He did not hide his desire to grieve her, yet he carried her sorrows like precious memories. He did not make it obligatory to love him, yet he did not leave other options, but not by force. She could almost see him spread his wings over the forbidden forest, as if the trees, and even their shadows, were created of his own darkness. The black river herself wanted to be one with this darkness, as if she could feel the ocean turn into the night sky.  

He offered unconditional protection for her, but he was very clear about taking away her sons, yet with such simplicity that she did not even notice his deadly strategies! If not for the great grief that was about to overwhelm her, she felt that she might have smiled at the Devil’s fairness!  

In all these tidings, she could feel the sanctity of pure love, the holy desires of the lover who had no patience for competition. The evil itself seemed deceptive, because when she looked into his eyes, she could only see the dreams of a quiet lake, and of the silent light that shines in the darkness. She judged again and again, only to find that he did not betray anyone- no, not even his enemies, all of whom were pretending to be like him! Instead, he would rather give the sons his likelihood, and put them through the same trials of hell that he goes through, just to be fair.

However, Shanaya was much crueller, by all means! The White Queen did not entertain the luxury of giving the condemned ones a fair trial, and instead intended to finish all of them in one heavenly ragini, if not for him. So, if anyone was patiently protecting her sons from immediate annihilation, it was still Orpheus, who was the Lord of Hell!

Sandhya was perplexed at the complexity of this politics, and at the same time, realized that she must determine her role in the theatre, so the show must go on! She knew that the fates were strange, and her wisdom told her to follow Orpheus like a waking dream. She was readying herself for a new era, an eventuality that was deceptive yet not deceitful.

She could feel that Orpheus was smiling to himself, knowing well that his plan had succeeded. However, she could not see anything beyond the silver mask.

Thus was the soliloquy of the Dark Queen, when she realized that, all of a sudden, she had been called upon by the forbidden forest to absolve the karmic debts that she had long ignored, whether by apathy or by love.    

Te corpus nihili, tu es daemon meus amator!

Obstiti contra; tandem apparuit persona: absolve mihi!

Derivat daemonum discessu pietas mandata sancta.

Non tristis aegrota; sum callida abstinere furiis.

Te corpus nihili, tu es daemon meus amator!

प्रत्यतिष्ठम् अहं घोरे; ततश्चाविर्बभूव सः ।

रूपं किमपि मे रक्ष, मुञ्च मामिति चाब्रुवम् ॥

दूरे याताः पिशाचास्ते, धर्मोऽगृह्णात् पवित्रताम् ।

नाहं शोचामि रुक्मग्नः, सुदक्षो रक्षसां भये ॥

त्वं मे शरीरं शून्यस्य, त्वं मे राक्षस-प्रेमिकः॥

*Latin and Sanskrit are written with help of AI. 

Pretensions of the Dusk

[ Ego, Orpheus, mulierem lapsam ad paenitentiam vocavi. ]

The desires of the dusk were narrated with an inevitable conclusion of dark poetry. Across the deadly bend, the men were summoned to witness the cataclysmic regret of the black river, the rage of not having killed everyone near and far! Her fatalism was absolute, of terror and revenge, and of her askance at the forbidden forest.

She had found her lover whom she could doom, someone who would willingly disappear within her endless dark lust, and yet make her cry at his loss. Vice intended to know if, at all, her lover was worthy of her vengeance, and if not, still worthy of dying every moment for her!

Sandhya wanted to understand if she could engulf the infernal and derive her evil power from their souls. She had tried to love her men with a true heart, and had entrusted them with agreements, only to find that she had been used by the demons to derive the blessing of life, a safeguard in hell that they took only for granted.

At first, she was oblivious, as she was fragile, and thought of it as her solemn duty to protect her love for the prisoners. Then, when she felt betrayed, she turned to deceit and malice, a strategy that indebted her to the laws of hell, for then she found that she must rely on imperial forgiveness for her vindication.

She was yet to realize that the absolute nothingness of the forbidden forest required all debts to be answered, even if by eternal unforgiveness. She could deny everyone, but she could not deny the karma she had acquired, even though she tried to ignore it as an obsolete necessity that could be met with pretensions. By the time she had come to know Orpheus, her debts were so momentous that she was at a loss as to how to come to terms with them!

The love of Orpheus was her last choice before she descended into solitary madness, inconsequential or not. His presence within her was unlike anything else she had ever experienced, for now she had started to feel the assurance of finding the consort of her hellish fantasies.

She wanted to confess all her lies to him, but he had quieted her with a kiss of forgiveness, as if it hurt him to hear how far she had fallen. Sandhya almost knew that nothing was hidden from Orpheus, and that he was imploring her to forbid herself from deceit, so as her outstanding debts would eventually be redeemed by her repentance.

In all this, she could sense that deceit and deception were different at the core, and her pretensions were adored by the poet. She also sensed that the lives of her sons were demanded of her, a duty of absolving the agreements that were once sealed by blood oath.  

Thus were Sandhya’s confessions to the forest, as she lay sleepless on her oceanic jasper bed, believing that the early morning light would show her the way, without asking that she forbids herself from trusting herself.

Lamentare mihi, o sancte liberator, lamentare te descendentem ad inferna.

Te cognosco paradoxum, te cognosco sagacem,

Te apparuisse et sanctum mihi, sanctum mihi terrorem.

Tempora diruuntur confusa, tibi non decipiam me, ipse vocaris mirari aethera.

Et mihi paradisus es? Et me ipse paradisum reddes?

मदर्थं विलापं कुरु, हे पवित्र परित्रातः, नरकं प्रति गच्छन्तं त्वामेव विलापं कुरु।
त्वाम् एकं विरोधाभासं जानामि, त्वां च धीमन्तं जानामि,
मम पुरतः तव प्रकटनं हि एकं पवित्रं भयं, मम कृते पवित्रं भयम् एवाभूत्।
व्याकुलाः कालाः विदीर्यन्ते, मा स्म त्वाम् वञ्चयेयम्, त्वं स्वयम् आकाशं वीक्षितुम् आहूतोऽसि।
किं त्वं मम परलोक इव असि? किं च त्वं स्वयमेव माम् अपि नन्दनवनं करिष्यसि?

*Latin and Sanskrit are written with the help of AI. 

* { Vijaya Dashami , 2026 }

The Tears of the Blue Flower

[ Ego, Orpheus, lapsam suis mendaciis feminam liberavi. ]

It was a cloudy, early morning wonder that drew Orpheus closer to the river. He was staring very still at the sight of a blue flower near the edge of the black river, at a place where the petals seemed to whisper the strangest tidings to the water.

He had paused his flute, as if waiting for the tearful music of the water to wander within his heart, knoweth in perfect melody with a distant nightingale, a bird singing of secrets that the river yearned for. The birdsong alighted on the petals of the Phlox like a white butterfly, whose fairy wings were reminiscent of memories yet unheard of.

He was thinking of Sandhya, how beautiful she is, and how she had held his hand like a prayer. She seemed to mesmerize his thoughts in a spell that was true of the soul, yet doubtful of his heart. He could sense the river was deceitful at its wild turns, maybe warning him not to come near anymore. The lonely phlox was poised on the edge of a turn like a silent witness to his rendezvous with Sandhya, her bluish-mauve presence held sacrosanct in the purity of the poet’s heart.   

Sandhya had looked him in the eyes after she had gently taken away his mask. Her own eyes were of a misty blue hue, and he could see eons of desire reflected in them, memories that she herself had forgotten.

She had asked him in a desperate plea to love her evermore, yet she could not ask him to release her sons from his paradox. Instead, she had ventured to ask Orpheus why she could not love any other men before him, as she had hoped to love him.

Her confessions were true, as she admitted to having loved other men with the same devotion, but had found her heart betrayed every single time. She had begun to wonder if there was something wrong in her, in so much as her ability to love was concerned.  

Orpheus could sense the sorrow of her heart, a strange sadness lamenting less at the fall of man, and more of her own forbearance. He had held her naked waist with a bold embrace, while her tears touched his black garment like the evanescence of blood from the heart of a dying man. The lover had kissed her gently, yet he had allowed her to cry, while her black hair rested on his chest.   

Thus was the despair of Sandhya, as she felt she could trust Orpheus with the sanctity of her heart, like the river trusted the distant ocean.

O sancte, e nobis tollatur sanctus amorque;

Discessisti, at non tristia me retinent.

Oro te, signis reseratis, triumphus sit tandem;

Te credens, ipsi mystica mortis patent.

Captivitas discedit, nova iam lux admonet orbem;

Non te decipio, dum te, mea vita, amo.

हे पवित्र, प्रणश्येत पवित्रः प्रणयोऽपि नः ।

यातस्त्वं तु न मां शोका बन्धनस्थां प्रकुर्वते ॥

द्वारामुक्तेऽद्य मार्गे ते, विजयोऽस्तु प्रसीद मे ।

त्वयि विश्‍वसतीं मृत्युरहस्यं प्रापयत्यसौ ॥

बन्धो गच्छति, भूलोकं नवं प्रबोधयेन्महः ।

न त्वां वञ्चयामि क्वापि, जीवने मयि रागिणि ॥

* Latin and Sanskrit are written with the help of AI.